Owner/Director
“When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, ‘I used everything you gave me.’“
– Erma Bombeck
The daughter of Charles L. and Marie Whigham, Carolyn was born in Newark, New Jersey. Her courageous spirit and determination came early in life as she was one of only ten (10) children of color matriculating at Vailsburg High School from 1962 until 1966. The following year, Carolyn enrolled at Virginia State College in Petersburg, Virginia majoring in Business Administration. She was recognized for outstanding leadership being elected Ms. R.O.T.C. (and so began her moniker as the Little General).
After marrying in 1974, Carolyn moved to Los Angeles, California and began a successful career in real estate. Bennett and Bennett Associates soon became the largest black owned property management company in Los Angeles earning them a feature in Black Enterprise Magazine. Not only was the business growing but more importantly the birth of both children, Steveland and Kara-Lynn. In 1984, after her divorce the family moved back to Newark where Carolyn made the decision to enroll in the American Academy of McAllister School of Mortuary Science graduating in 1986. Upon graduation, she received the Thomas Quinn Award for the Most Outstanding Student and so began her esteemed career. She has been a NJ state funeral director for over 27 years.
Carolyn worked side by side with her father for many, many years learning the management side of the business and the “art” of embalming. She was inspired by her father to travel to Egypt to study the Egyptian Art of Embalming because the business was constantly evolving. He never wanted her to become complacent with just knowing one methodology. In 1993 when Charles L. Whigham made his transition, Carolyn assumed ownership continuing the legacy and preparing the third generation. Steveland and Kara who are also licensed funeral directors.
Families who walk through the doors of the Whigham Funeral Home are always assured that their loved ones would be treated with love and respect because the business of dying has more to do with the living. Carolyn firmly believes in leading by example so she too meets with families; embalms; answers phones and directs funerals. Featured in the New York Times and most recently Star-Ledger reporter Barry Carter wrote, “Her style has been praised the world over and even caught the attention of a funeral director in Liberia, who wants her to start a branch in his country.”
Carolyn is an accomplished speaker, hosting seminars on “How to Conduct High Profile Funerals” that were accredited by the New Jersey State Board of Mortuary Science with attendees from New Jersey, New York and Pennsylvania. She is a member of St. James A.M.E. Church; Bethany Chapter #43 Order of Eastern Stars; PHA member of Essex, Hudson and Union Funeral Directors Association; Garden State Funeral Directors Association and serves on the New Jersey Board for the Statutes of Women.
Carolyn credits her philanthropic efforts for the betterment of the community to her father who founded City National Bank, the first black owned bank in New Jersey. She has partnered with the Newark YMCA to create housing for the chronically homeless because everyone should have a place to call their own. Although private time is often non-existent, she chooses to celebrate her birthday and Christmas with the homeless, inviting hundreds to dinner complete with transportation and gifts. Her dedication comes with its share of sacrifice having to cancel vacations with her partner of more than 16 years Terry Whigham; missing her children’s games and interrupted dinner engagements. But according to Carolyn, “Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass…It’s about learning how to dance in the rain.”
Over 6,000 funerals including names you probably know like Sarah Vaughn, Whitney Houston, John Houston (Whitney’s father), Congressman Donald Payne, Lance Owens (Queen Latifah’s brother), Emily Miles (Newark fashion designer) and names you may not know like Louise Agnes Nelson (Newark resident), Edward Stafford (Newark resident) and thousands more. Every family receives the same gold service whether they’re the very rich or the very rich in heart. Along with Steve and Kara, she is the mother of Aazim, Chastity, Chad and Nyle. Grandmother of 9 who affectionately call her, “Spice.”
FAQs
Funerals can cost as little as $1000 for a direct disposition. (Direct disposition includes registering the death, a basic casket or container, and transporting the deceased to a cemetery or crematorium) For an adult, full-service funeral, consumers choose to spend an average of $5000.
Do funeral directors keep bodies? ›
If you do not opt for embalming, the funeral director can prepare your loved one's body for a viewing before their funeral following many of the same steps – washing the person's body, setting their features, brushing their hair and dressing them. The person's body will be kept refrigerated in between viewings.
Who makes the most at a funeral home? ›
High Paying Funeral Professional Jobs
- Funeral Director. Salary range: $52,500-$76,000 per year. ...
- Embalmer. Salary range: $41,000-$58,000 per year. ...
- Cemetery Caretaker. Salary range: $42,500-$50,500 per year. ...
- Funeral Arranger. Salary range: $44,000-$50,000 per year. ...
- Crematory Operator. ...
- Funeral Attendant.
Since the design of the coffin is much more tapered, the materials being used are also minimal compared to a casket. The price of a casket can range from an average of $800 to over $20,000 while the price for coffins can average at around $400 and is usually lower than the cost of a casket.
How much money to give at a funeral? ›
What is an appropriate donation at a funeral? If you are giving a donation in lieu of flowers, then donate the amount you would have spent on flowers. Typically, this means $50 to $100. However, the amount is ultimately up to you because it is the thought that counts and not the amount you donate.
What are some things funeral directors won t tell you? ›
6 Things Funeral Directors are Dying to Tell You (But Never Will)
- #1: First off, they aren't who you think we are.
- #2: They aren't rich, either.
- #3: What they do is not easy.
- #5: Your genuine appreciation makes their job completely worth it.
- #6: They are morticians, but not magicians.
- One last thing…
Funeral directors typically do not receive gratuities. However, it's customary to thank the funeral director with a thank-you note, and by leaving a positive review for the funeral home online.
What happens when you go to funeral directors? ›
When you come through the front door, you will be greeted warmly by a staff member. Names will be exchanged, and hands shaken in cordiality. Some words of comfort will be offered. Once informed of the reason for your visit, you will be directed to the funeral director's office or arrangement office.
Do they drain the blood before cremation? ›
Is a body drained before cremation? Draining a body of fluids does not happen before cremation. If a body is embalmed before cremation, the bodily fluids are exchanged (drained, and then replaced) with chemicals during the embalming process. These chemicals are also fluid.
Do morticians empty the bowels? ›
I then puncture the internal organs to drain the fluid. I remove the contents of the intestines, bowels and bladder, too, as these can give off gases and smell. I don't come into contact with the fluids. It's very clean and tidy.
The only parts of the body that are removed before cremation are artificial ones like a medical device or implant with a battery, silicone, pins, radiation pressurization, pacemakers, and large hip, knee, and shoulder replacements along with any external jewelry.
What is the busiest funeral? ›
The body is presented in a simple open casket with an image of the deceased, and an image of Buddha placed nearby. Mourners may also lay candles, fruit, flowers and light incense around the body. After the ceremony, the casket is sealed and carried to the crematorium.
Who is the main person at a funeral? ›
Typically, you will need someone to lead the ceremony, known as the officiant. This is usually a religious leader or someone else with experience leading funerals. In some traditions, the officiant will also be the one to read (and even write) the eulogy.
Do morticians do autopsies? ›
A coroner or a medical examiner, not a mortician, makes the decision to conduct an autopsy. Performing autopsies is done to establish the reason for death, particularly in situations where the death occurred abruptly, without warning, or probably as a result of illegal actions.
Is $10,000 enough for a funeral? ›
Is $10,000 enough for a funeral? For some people, $10,000 is enough to pay for a funeral. The median cost of a funeral is almost $8,000, but can range to over $10,000 depending on the options you choose.
Is $20000 enough for a funeral? ›
So, the overall average funeral costs can quickly run between $10,000 - $20,000 in total. How much does a cremation cost?
Does the state of Illinois help with funeral expenses? ›
The Department pays the funeral and burial expenses of a person who at the time of death: was receiving any of the following kinds of assistance: Temporary Assistance for Needy Families (TANF) Cash.
What is the most expensive part of a funeral? ›
A casket often is the single most expensive item you'll buy if you plan a "traditional" full-service funeral. Caskets vary widely in style and price and are sold primarily for their visual appeal.
